Updates

1) Meds tweak doing great things. Got to a great doc - one who actually listens! And he gave me great news on the hormones, based on (gasp) recent research rather than old wives' tales. It pays to see a specialist.

2) Ditto. Dr on anti-depressants gave me one of those bump pills that you take with the anti-dep. And it works. So that's much better.

3) The Knee. Finally got self to a different doc - one who'd listen to me (!!) and she looked at the X-ray and said 'well, there's the problem! That's bone-on-bone arthritis! No torn meniscus; there's no meniscus left. That's the source of your pain.' Well, gee. Great. It's odd how much a relief a diagnosis can be, even if you don't want the ailment itself. But from diagnosis to the decision to replace the knee (nothing short of that is going to 'cure' the condition) was not hard and surgery is tentatively scheduled for early January. Meanwhile, I have bone on bone pain. The cortisone shot did zip (dammit), but the surgeon doesn't want to do the surgery until at least shot + 4 weeks. So now I'm trying to get something for the pain. Luckily, it's not too long and there's nothing that requires me to be on my feet or use the knee extensively between now and then.

4) The big news is that retirement plans are changing mightily. Hugely. As in... I'm most likely going to retire at the end of the spring term. I'm so fed up with my uni, and the current idiocy that sticking it out for a couple more years is just ridiculous. And unnecessary. Another change is location: not going to France. Thinking about Olympic Peninsula; which is a huge change but I am so excited about it it's funny. Some days I just want to leave now and others I'll be okay to go next week. August seems just impossibly far away. At the moment, the plan is to pack in August: three stacks: to be unpacked there,  to go into storage there and to donate/sell here. Hopefully the last will be the big pile. Then I'll call in the movers, they'll load appropriately and I'll take off with the animals and drive up. Where I will have a place to move into (rental). I'll commit to about a year to see if I like the place, if I can stand the weather (the Olympic rain shadow promises less rain and gray than Seattle, which I knew I'd never be able to stand) and that there's enough life there to make me happy. If yes, then I can spend next spring looking for a permanent residence there. If no, I'll try something/someplace else.

That is me being semi-rational. There are other times when I find a house up there and want to buy now, just take the leap. My friends here keep talking me out of such impulses. Sometimes I even thank them.

Why the change? Well, the biggest bit is the mess of a prioritization study being done on campus. It started last spring, when campus morale was already very bad. Over the past 7 months, the PTB have misled the entire process in so many ways. Buy-in was good; everybody seemed to understand that we as a university needed to take a hard look, figure out what's important, what we're doing well, all the things that 'prioritization' would seem to entail. But from the first, there's been very little in the way of solid information or leadership. The committees formed, then discovered that it would require lots of summer work. Well, for the people on staff who have 12 month employment, that was no big deal, but for faculty on 9 month contracts (most of us, say 95%) that meant lots of extra, unpaid work. They did it, dedicated to the goals and the university. But then they found out - only once into it - just how much work it was going to be. Everybody I've talked to said it was like taking on an additional part time job.

Once they'd one their work, they rolled out what the various departments had to do. We're a small program - 4 faculty, a dozen majors - we had 5 different reports to do: program, department, major, minor and shared minor. The reports required data that we didn't have, and that data was to come from various admin units. Except it didn't. It did come very late, and then was wrong, and then we were told to just use it. My dinosaurs wrote the department reports (me being not allowed anywhere near it), smug in the belief that nothing they did would really matter. So they made it up, used decades old data (based on memory and wishful thinking), and turned it in. And it's been like sending things into a black hole.

There's been no feedback, as those same over-whelmed committee 'champions' then had to read all those reports.  And then decide, based on something else, where in the 5 level matrix of importance, the program/dept/major/minor/shared minor lands.

All that was to have been done by now. The reports were promised to the Deans the first week of January. And then, shaZAAM!! The thing could be implemented in January and we'd be all reconfigured and shiny and new by end of spring term.

You can imagine, I'm sure, the mess that has ensued. Fear. Loathing. Distrust. Disgust. Fear everywhere, as we're all awaiting the ax. The Deans aren't sure whether or not they'll have a chance to rebut the findings, or where they fit in this process. And they have 100 times more voice than faculty. The distrust is palatable. There are those - my dinosaurs - who are confident that nothing will change. They are in a small minority. Most are afraid. Does not make for pleasant work environment.

One prof today told me that we're on the Titanic and his feet are wet. The lifeboats are in the water and loading. And, he's sure, the uni Prez is playing the part of Nero, playing while Rome burns. Or maybe he's the captain of that cruise ship that went aground off Italy: too busy packing his own bags to abandon ship to take notice of his passengers and crew. We could use Captn Smith....  Knowing enough to avoid the mess? Well, that might be too much to ask.